I give up. My brain is fried. WARNING: too much information comin' your way. And, I'll probably regret this over sharing tomorrow.
But I'm so tired! I know everyone is busy. It's Christmas time and there's lots going on. I get it. But I'm stressed and I'm not enjoying it.
I finally got to the gym today, for the first time in 3 weeks, and I'm STILL in my sweaty stinky clothes, 14 hours later. I literally haven't had a spare minute to shower. The worst thing about this is that it's TYPICAL for me! Something's gotta give.
Part of it is that I'm trying to get ready to start homeschooling in January. December is just busy. My husband has two jobs and is never home. And Primary is crazy trying to get ready for next year.
But also, my downfall has always been that I'm interested in everything, I want to be good at everything, I want to DO everything and BE everywhere, read everything, talk to everyone, and get everything done. I love to cook/bake, so I have glorious plans for Christmas food. Because I'm too stressed, probably none of it will happen. I like to give handmade gifts, so I have plans to MAKE gifts for friends, neighbors, teachers, and grandparents. Not going to happen. I want to make cute Christmas cards and make each one individualized and sweet and witty and homemade. NEVER going to happen. This is, by the way, why none of you has received a Christmas card the last several years. I'm a perfectionist, and I won't do something until I can do it the way I want to. So, I end up not doing a lot of things. I'm seriously debilitated! As part of our Christmas countdown, I printed up an activity for every day up until Christmas and put each one in a little decorated matchbox that we open every night. We're already behind. (The matchboxes are cute, though.) But I'm stressed about the things we're not doing, so then the time that I AM spending with my kids, I'm stressed out and not enjoying.
I have to stop this.
It's time to simplify.
Sorry friends, neighbors and teachers, NO handmade gifts.
Christmas cards will be sent, but they won't be cute or individualized, and probably not witty. (AHHHH! Not sure if I can handle this one).
And I'm finally going to turn the Christmas shopping over to Kirk, which he said two weeks ago that he'd do, but that I haven't given him a chance to do. It's all yours babe. I'm outtie.
I haven't even looked at my Christmas binder, so it's time to hit the book and get organized.
Okay. I'm slightly relieved....and cringing just a bit.
I can do it. I can do it.
Time to take a warm shower and sit with hot cocoa admiring my Christmas tree lights.
And breath.
And go to bed before 1am tonight.
Wish me luck.
4 comments:
Sonja,
I totally know what you are talking about! A couple of years ago, (right after I had Lydia) I wanted to send out Christmas cards, but I had a one month old, and felt overwhelmed, so I decided to just send out a few. I whittled my list down to those I knew would really really like one. My G'mas and G'pas, cousins who I was close to, and maybe hadn't seen in a long time, and close friends. It ended up being like 10 people. I could handle that, and felt like everyone else could wait til next year, and would totally understand. And they did! Just enjoy those kids. It goes by so quickly! Also, the fun of Christmas (for the kids especially)is the NOT perfectness of it all! As long as they see you having fun with it...it's good enough for them.
You're awesome Sonj! It's kind of a relief to hear I'm not the only one who's so stressed/busy that she's not enjoying this season. Good luck with the simplifying and I hope you start to feel a little less stressed soon!
Good luck!! You CAN do it! And simplifying is just plain smart. Good for you!
Hi Sonja, I love you. That's it. That's all I wanted to say.
Oh yeah, and go have a hot chocolate in peace. Bless you.
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